BY Talha Masud
If you are into some professional studies, preparing to jump in the practical world, physically exerting yourself for practicing your sport on a broader level, giving a good revision for your exams or even initiating the goal that you excite about to be in your future, then you all are termed as ‘Strugglers’.
This phase is undoubtedly, the toughest part of one’s life. Interestingly, very few realize its essence because for many of us, it comes as trouble-free and a gracious companion but only when it is to give us extremely tough time in our future pursuits. This period rationally, prolongs for all your life but its intensity is always on the highest if you are still an unsung hero.
They say, “When you are in prosperity, your friends are plenty but when in adversity, just one in twenty.” The normal reflection what the masses would give you on your success is awe-inspiring and far-fetched but the same would not tolerate you to a certain degree when you are in the hunt. On this simple theory, one can manipulate the demoralizing factors by considering the yardsticks of his/her struggle every now and then.
DON’T MAKE TOO MANY MENTORS:
There is a big propensity in the strugglers to get inspired from people way too easily. Making mentors is harmful. People with apparent success appeal you a great deal which is not that bad but the worst part comes when you start seeing yourself in their shoes. This not only sieges your intellectual growth but also leaves you aside from your own improving inclination. Add to this, when we make lots of mentors around us, we start behaving as clingers. Being a struggler, a word of appreciation puts you in the skies but on the flipside, a discouragement even by body language or gestures splinters you. You may run around the one who you consider your mentor and the person starts feeling being a savior and self-loving idiot and he would start making hollow-stylish moves to disengage you from being engaged in your task. Most of the times, they disappoint you, in a sense that you expect to learn from them but they take it as your voracity. And believe me, a single thing breaking your bubble of confidence on them can blow you apart. They could ignore your call on a popular pretext of being ‘busy’ and on the other hand remain really ‘busy’ in their self-serving deeds. So you have got to be extremely careful. You are always better than your mentors. Its just you don’t have that belief in you and by the time you start achieving things your mentors did on a small scale, the intricacy of yourself will automatically vanish.
MOTIVATION, BUT DIRECTIONAL:
In my childhood, I did not understand the rhetoric of our elders for us to study. They never told me what to study in particular for my shortcomings. All they told is to study. Being a school pupil, if you are reading a novel from a magazine which is not for the student of your age at this period, still, you can leave a satisfactory impression on those who don’t give us direction. Direction is imperative to build upon your initiative. If hard work is directed to your aim with the motivational instincts you possess, then you can have a sigh of relief of not going astray.
ACCOMPLISH ‘RSA’:
Before start whining about the constraints others put your way, mostly near relatives when you go against their agreement for your future prospects, then consider this very important theory. A young speaker at YLC after hearing my personal stumbling blocks from people associated to me impressed me by his ‘RSA’ concept. According to this hypothesis, when we are to do something different and better than what folks around us did, we encounter three stages.
1. RIDICULE
2. STRONG OPPOSITION
3. ACCEPTANCE
Now if you are on the first stage, hold yourself because after ridiculing on you, people would put strong opposition against you and if you are on the second stage then believe me, you are very near to be accepted and accomplished with what you wanted to be.
HAVE SOME PAIN:
There was a boxer from Latin America whose statistics proved him an unbeatable rival in his fights. Before even coming into the international arena, he got immense fame. In those days boxing did not pay a lucrative recompense. Between, he got a job with attractive salary and perks and left boxing. After few years, watching the great Mohammad Ali’s interview who expressed that although he didn’t face the early retired boxer in the fray but was afraid of him made this man jump out of his bed. He could not believe that Mohammad Ali has uttered such strong remarks for him. He again went to his coach and asked him to impart the training again. The coach answered; “You can’t be a boxer anymore.” The man got puzzled and asked the reason to which the coach summed up the conversation with the sentence; “You don’t have fire left in you.”
From the above incidence, the fire or pain gives a push as the driving force for your goal. Keep in mind that while tracking down your vision, you don’t derail from it. Another type of pain is the pangs that compel you to prove yourself. It can be domestic imbalances, failed crush, feeling of resentment, social rejection or unjust treatment, all can play a hidden part in your robust emergence but taking positives out of above mentioned is not an easy task. It, on most occasions further digress your endeavor. Every hero has a tragedy as every commoner. The difference lies in perception after the fact.
RESPECT YOUR SINCERE NEARS AND DEARS:
Because they are your only true friends. They are those filtered gems who deserve to be respected. Many of them would not use sugar-coated words to your benefit or portray to be a bit inconsiderate but you have to respect them as their sole motive is your development. Minus those element from them who are there for arguments’ sake or for distorting your frame of mind. Don’t listen to everyone too. Talent is what you are blessed with and none can improvise it for you. You just have to polish your skills and having docile attitude towards your well-wishers is something that takes you very higher.
COMPETE WITH YOURSELF:
The marginal progress in you would never end if you act upon this rule. What were you in last summer to the changes for the better you feel in yourself in this spring is how you evaluate your enhancement. You are your best competitor. Many of strugglers like me fall prey to the enchanting growth of others who were below par in our age. The greatest competitive contemporary is yourself and the more you engage in self-tussle, the better results you will produce.
SET YOUR PRIORITIES:
In your priorities, list to target your limitations first. Additionally, you need to get acclimatized on what you have set your sights. This will put you at ease to further your struggle. Don’t pity on yourself if you are not living a life as the guy or girl next door lives. Reassure yourself that you are not here to drift but to make efforts by all might and main. If you are not versed with the latest Hollywood releases, the new upcoming glamour sensations, you can’t drive a car as good as your first cousin does or you are not a computer savvy, it really doesn’t matter a bit. These things can be grasped at any stage of your life and what better time than when you have completed your basics in order to start a magnificent career.
Sonu Nigam, my personal favorite tells in one of his interviews that when he first came to Mumbai to get his first break, he has to ask for the rent of the flat he lived in, back from his home. He described how long he had to wait before he got his first duet. He puts in the picture of a normal day during his struggling juncture when he was riding on a scoter and saw an eye-catching girl. He was so mesmerized in her that he could not see the road jump and had a minor accident with bruises. He said when he saw his scars in the mirror, he nearly slapped himself that how for granted is he taking his struggling phase. According to him, this small incident made him focused eliminating all the diverting factors from his goal.
COMPANY MATTERS:
It reflects you. You have to be around those people most of the times, with whom your compatibility flourishes. The best thing in achieving your goal is to think about it. Like a cricket player thinks after the match that if he had not missed that specific catch, he would have helped his team and his own morale. This thought process is an essential tool for the growth and it helps you improve in no time. What company does is it inculcates some benchmarks. If you are in a company that has the favorite topic of ‘mobile’ and ‘bachi’, then congratulations! You will prosper in these areas of interest. It is entirely your show with communication that depicts the soul of the society you move in. On a very serious note, a company with literary arguments in vogue or ideas to muster the common perspectives of your friends is a blessing.
LET YOURSELF DREAM:
For your dreams are your assets to capitalize upon. Your provocation is also because of your dreams but only when you don’t try to interpret them practically. When you let yourself dream, you let the fervor of achievement in yourself. For all those who struggle, dreams are implanted for the destination they eye as Mr. Pirzada Qasim, the University of Karachi’s Vice Chancellor splendidly writes:
Main aesay shakhs ko zindoon main kya shumaar karun
Jo sochta bhi nahi, khuwaab dekhtha bhi nahi………
